Happy New Year: Movie on a Monday night, that too after a longish festival weekend? No, Normally not, but this one had Deepika, so lustingly we headed to the nearest cinemas! We came out a good three hours later, uncertain in our assessments! So what did it have? Flesh, Flesh and some more Flesh! That Deepika is sizzling hot, with a toned body and great dancing skills goes without saying! That she can act, has been proven all through 2013! That there are SRK and Sonu Sood showing off their 8 pack abs was also well advertised! So what was there beyond these bod-shows in the movie? Well. it was Abhishek Bacchan, trying to hide his hairy flabbiness! Just Imagine his complexes, surrounded by bodies beautiful all around him! He had few options available to him! He chose to take the situation head on and in the process out-shadowed the mighty SRK!
So basically the story is about a vendetta, which is achieved through an international heist and dance competition, with a motley crew of Boman Irani, Sonu Sood, Abhishek and Vivaan Shah led by SRK.
It has crazy cross references to SRK's previous films, which may amuse you to begin with but sound insipid beyond a point. There is this annoying fixation which each of the gang has about one of their parents! So Boman, at 50 years of age, is petrified of his mom, Sonu will start fuming through his ears at the mere mention of his mom, Deepika keeps referring to her mom and of course SRK has a father who has been wronged by Jackie Shroff! ( As this is central to the theme, it is not annoying!)
Abhishek and the Shah boy also have some such issue but I have already forgotten about it!
Considering the movie is by Farah Khan and one of the sub plots is dancing, I was expecting some great dance numbers, but barring one, really the choreography was uninspiring and music good only in parts! The lights and costumes hurt the eyes as they once did in Las Vegas and I was left rummaging through the hand bag for my shades!
Biggest discovery in the film? That SRK is bored with Hindi cinema! He looks spaced out, for want of a better word! I wonder why? Is he getting even with Farah Khan for their "Katti", but isn't Gauri Khan the Producer? Or is he getting even with both? I don't know, but despite being good, he's not in his elements here! In a sense, it was an opportunity for the others and each one did something better than his previous celluloid appearance!
Final verdict, funny and watchable, but just about! AND, when will Bollywood realise that a movie is not a Board Examination where you must provide the mandatory Three Hours to unravel the mystery of the Question Paper!

L

Haider

Haider

                          What qualifies for a great movie? Simply, Haider! A great screenplay, one of the best cinematographies, brilliant acting by almost everyone, a clever adaptation of one of the most sublime tragedies (Hamlet) of all times and seamless infusion of the same with contemporary, identifiable Kashmir militancy, all contribute to a memorable experience.

                          Shahid as Haider is the Aligarh Univ educated, English speaking, Kashmiri youth, out on a mission to find his missing father in the valley, while discovering new aspects of his "half-widowed" mother. He's torn asunder, almost going mad, by her deceit on the one hand and her love for him on the other! Kay Kay Menon, is the snake who poisons the life of this small family and he is hatefully brilliant in his portrayal of a treacherous brother, lover and uncle!

                           But Shahid is more engrossing than his last three best roles put together, while Tabu as his mother has never done a better job than this. And that's saying a lot, considering she has been consistently brilliant! Oedipus Complex has never been portrayed better in Hindi cinema. How is it that Tabu is so convincing in all her self-contradictory manifestations in this film? When she says that she had no poison in her heart against her husband, you believe her; when she is with Kay Kay and hinting at betrayal, you are left wondering whether she's a victim or an accomplice; when she swears to die for her son, she is your normal, loving mother; even her Oedipal behaviour is mostly matter of fact! The movie most certainly belongs to Tabu, but that is also relatively speaking, considering how credibly Shahid plays the role of a vulnerable, innocent, fragile character who needs to be mothered, while trying to seek vengeance for his hero of a father!

                             How can I not comment on my favourite Irrfan Khan? His appearance puts purpose into the narrative, which by that time had started meandering a bit! Just proves, it’s not the length of your role that matters, but how central it is to the progression of the narrative  and how effectively you deliver that. Full marks to him for his portrayal but even fuller marks (!) to Vishal Bharadwaj for making the Ghost of Hamlet’s father come alive through a character named Roohdaar! That was brilliantly inventive, if nothing else was.

                              Some scenes (entrapment play) were not so well done, but let’s forget them because on the whole, the film retains your interest and does provide periodic comic relief in an otherwise heavy theme. Literal translations of the famous soliloquies were avoidable, but it was not jarring. In any case I am feeling magnanimous enough to forgive and forget a few deficiencies!

I loved the climax when Shahid is besieged by his mother’s advice on the one hand and his father’s appeal for revenge on the other! That it manages to leave a socio-political-ethical message for the youth is an added bonus. Go watch the movie to see the choice Shahid makes!

Often times we have all witnessed "Shradhhalus" ( devout) holding road side langars ( community free food distribution) on religious occasions such as Durgaashtmi, Navmi, some Jayanti or just for thanks-giving to your favourite Deity for prayers answered. 
While I have high regard for people who take time and money out for service of humanity, to feed the poor or not-so-poor, what they leave behind on pack-up is a greater dis-service to mankind than anything else! Plastic plates, spoons, styrofoam glasses, fly-away carry bags of 5 micron or even less thickness all lie strewn on pavements where the langar was held, waiting for some municipal worker to come and clear it.
Today on this day of Durgaashtami, Gandhi/Shastri Jayanti and on launch of Swachh Bharat campaign, let us appeal to all religious and community organisations to specifically avoid leaving litter behind while they serve humanity by holding free kitchens ! Use the traditional degradable Doña-Patta-kulhar for serving and take them with you when you leave!
Amen!